Once Upon a Depression
by Mufflebit
Summary: Alexis is a 15 year old with depression who wants to get away from the world. What happens when she ends up in Narnia? Couldn't think of a better title or summary. EdmundxOC
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing except for Allie. Everything else is C.S. Lewis's.

Note: Everyone's older in this story. Lucy is fourteen, Edmund is sixteen, Susan is seventeen and Peter is eighteen.

My firstfic…Here goes!

Once Upon a Depression

Shouts rang out from the first floor of a large colonial house. A husband and wife were yelling at each other, filling the house with cursing and screaming. The argument had started over a small dent in the car and had bloomed to a shouting match, both now angry because of two different things.

15-year-old Alexis Scottson quietly closed the bathroom door and locked it. She hated when her parents argued with each other, which was more often that not. She had no doubt that they would soon be divorced, and she would be bouncing between two different lives.

Allie turned on the faucet in the tub and let it fill up with hot water. She could still hear her parents through the door, even over the running faucet.

While the bathtub was filling up, she leaned against the sink and stared at her reflection in the mirror. She was nothing special. Wavy brown hair that reached her mid-back was pulled into a pony-tail and her large brown eyes, thin, pale lips and fairly large and pointy nose added to her plain-looking appearance. She was average height for her age and was a bit gangly. Her parents always told her that she was beautiful, but of course they would say that; they _were_ her parents. Parents tell you stuff like that to boost your self-esteem. Not that Allie had very high self-esteem anyway.

She desperately wished she had a sibling. Preferably a sister. Someone to talk to whenever she needed it, someone to give her advice and comfort, someone to help her through problems. She never dared to ask her parents for anything, because they always seemed to get worked up about things and were always stressed out.

_What I would give to get away from this world_, she thought miserably.

Turning off the water, she slipped into the bathtub without getting undressed. Closing her eyes, she dunked her head under the water and attempted to wash away all her troubles, all her problems, all her sins.


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you to my reviewers! You guys are awesome! And I'll take your advice. :)

Also, do you think I should call her Allie or Alexis? If you review, please state your opinion.

Disclaimer: If I owned Narnia, I would probably be rich now. But I'm not.

Allie lay in the tub beneath the water until she ran out of air. She resurfaced to grab another breath and went back under.

Attempting to sort everything out, her mind became full of thoughts and she felt overwhelmed.

_If only I hadn't been born. Maybe life for Mom and Dad would be easier that way. I'm too much of a hassle and a problem. They do so much for me, but what do I do for them? What _can _I do for them? Going to the doctor costs so much. If only I didn't have this depression. They would save so much money—money from therapy, psychiatry, the prescription which isn't even helping much anyway. If only I wasn't here, if only they didn't have to care for me, if only, if only, if only…_

Allie let her face surface to get more air, and found that she was crying.

"Oh, don't cry. You're so weak, Al," she said out loud. "You have to be strong if you ever want to get anywhere in this world. Don't be such a baby." But this only made her cry more, and soon she was so miserable that she let herself sink and didn't bother rising again when she needed air.

_If I just died now…_

But she didn't have time to think of what would happen if she died, for she suddenly felt herself being pulled out of the water and dropped on the ground. She immediately flared up, thinking her father had interrupted her reverie. She coughed, gasping in air and yelled at her father.

"Dad! Can't you just leave me alone? Didn't I lock the door? I—" She stopped suddenly as she opened her eyes. She wasn't in the bathroom, or even in her town for that matter. She was lying on soft green grass by a small lake and there was a clear blue sky above her with small puffy clouds scuttling by. There was a large forest off to her right and trees sparsely scattered on the other side of the lake and beyond them, mountains rose up. Birds fluttered around and sang gaily in the trees.

Allie sat up, realizing that she was soaked. Hadn't she just been in her bathtub with her parents arguing downstairs? _Had_ she died?

"Heaven's awfully nicer that I expected," she said out loud. She jumped as someone laughed behind her. She quickly jumped up and whirled around.

"Heaven? Not really. It may seem like it, but this really isn't heaven." A boy around her age smiled warmly at her. He had dark brown hair, almost black, and brown eyes and was fairly tall. He wore a light blue tunic and riding boots, and carried a sword in a scabbard around his waist.

Allie stared blankly at him. "Umm…who are you? And where _am_ I?"

The boy (A/N: or young man, whatever) smiled even wider. "My name is Edmund. Welcome to Narnia."

"Narni-who?" Allie stared at Edmund, extremely confused. "How did I get to this Narnie place from my bathroom?"

"Narnia. It's called Narnia. And Aslan probably called you."

"Who's Aslan?"

"The creator of Narnia, the True King, Son of the Emperor-Beyond-the-Sea. He's got a few titles. I'm sure you'll meet him soon enough. He only calls humans when Narnia is in danger." Suddenly his face fell.

"What?" Allie asked.

"Something's probably going to happen to Narnia now that you're here. Why else would Aslan call you if you weren't needed?"

Allie looked at Edmund doubtfully. "You're not some messed-up freak who's trying to kidnap me, are you? 'Cause I'm telling you right now: I know Karate and will—"

Edmund laughed and held his hands up. "Calm down. I won't do any such thing. I promise. But perhaps you'll want to come with me to Cair Paravel. I never thought wet clothes were all too comfortable."

"Cair Paravel? And how do I know I can trust you? I've just met you. Besides, my mother always told me to never talk to strangers."

"I swear by the Lion's Mane that I will not do anything to harm you. That's a very big promise," he added, seeing Allie's look. "I also swear by the life of my horse and myself."

Allie debated with herself for a moment then shook her head. "Thanks, but no thanks. I think I'll just try to find my way back home myself. I'm not willing to take any chances. Besides, this is a dream. I'll wake up soon." She turned and strode off in the opposite direction.

Edmund sighed and shook his head and went over to his horse. He mounted Philip and reined him over in Allie's direction.

Once he caught up with her, Allie stopped. "What do you want now?"

"Well, I don't know what your name is."

"It doesn't really matter. Not to _you_."

Philip snorted. "What a cheeky lass! I say girl, have respect for the King!"

Allie's eyes widened and she took a step back. "Talking horses! And you, a king! You can't be much older than me! What's next? Unicorns and dragons?"

"Actually," Edmund said, "we do have those. Not many, but there are a few." He smiled innocently.

Allie opened her mouth to retort, but suddenly there was the sound of hoof beats and a creature appeared out of the forest. Allie gaped at the half-man, half-horse as it bowed to Edmund.

"My Lord," the centaur said. "The High King Peter has caught sight of the White Stag! The Hunting Party is after it now, and the High King requested me to find you so you may join the party."

Edmund nodded to the centaur. "Thank you, Gladewyn. It shall only take me a minute." He turned to Allie and started to say something to her before she fainted.

I hope it's not too Mary-Sue-ish. You probably can't really tell yet, but if you see a hint of Mary-Sue-ishness, please let me know.


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you to all of my reviewers! You all are awesome!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Ali sat up, blinking her eyes against the dazzling evening light streaming in through the window. She looked around herself in awe. This certainly wasn't her room. The last time she checked, she didn't have a four poster bed draped in red silk or have an enormous wardrobe, or her own bathroom. She got up out of the enormous bed and sank down in the crimson plush rug.

"I definitely didn't have _this_ rug at home. Or those curtains. Or that bureau. Heck, my room wasn't even shaped like this. And why am I wearing a dress? What kind of a dream is this, anyway?"

She wandered around the strange room and pinched herself a few times, attempting to wake herself up, but apparently she was already awake.

There was a knock on her door and she said "Come in" absentmindedly.

"How do you like your room?"

Ali turned around and saw Edmund standing in the doorway. She suddenly remembered everything that had happened and started stuttering. "A—oh. Erm, very nice, th-thank you. I, um, I'm sorry about before. Being so rude and all. I'm not very good with strangers, you see, and I'm very nervous around them and I really didn't know you were a King, otherwise I probably would have been more polite, but finding myself in wherever I am disoriented me a bit and—" She suddenly stopped, embarrassed, realizing that she had been rambling, which she always did when she was nervous.

"It's quite all right—I understand. It was a bit of a shock to find myself in Narnia too, but you do get used to it. It really is a lovely place."

There was a silence, which Ali found extremely uncomfortable. Finally, she said, "Did you want to, um, tell me something?"

"Oh, yes. My sister Susan will be in soon. She wanted to meet you. Peter had business to attend to and Lucy is out riding."

"Didn't that…horse thing say something about a hunt? Shouldn't you be on that right now?"

"The hunt? For the White Stag?" Ali nodded and Edmund frowned. "That was two days ago."

"Two days!" Ali shrieked, causing Edmund to wince. "I've been out for two days?"

Edmund merely nodded.

"Ugh! I've never slept for more than ten hours straight! Impossible! I could have been doing something resourceful. Oh, sh—Uh, I mean, oh shoot!" She kicked herself for nearly cussing in front of a King.

"Well, I'll leave you then. Susan should be here soon, and then you can join us for dinner later.

"But first, I don't believe I caught your name."

"Alexis. Alexis Scottson. But you can call me Ali."

He smiled. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Ali. Hopefully I will see you at dinner later."

He bowed and Ali returned it with an extremely clumsy curtsy which caused her to blush. Edmund merely grinned and left.

"Oh! Crud! Curses! What an _idiot_!" Ali mentally buffeted herself for making such a fool out of herself. First insulting a King and his talking horse, then passing out and then nearly falling over while trying to be polite and courteous.

"Hang it all," she grumbled as she collapsed back on the bed. "What _am_ I doing here? And where is here anyway? This must be a dream. A dream is all it is. I really just fell asleep in the tub and this is all a dream. Or…did I really die? Can dead people pass out? Oh, this definitely isn't normal."

She closed her eyes, feeling a bit overwhelmed. Perhaps she _wasn't_ dead and she really was in…Narnia. But how could that be possible? She had always loved fantasy and mystical lands, but now that she was in one, she was a bit frightened. And how on earth did she get here?

Ali heard the door open and she opened one eye. A girl a few years older than her stood in the doorway, looking at Ali curiously. She had long dark brown hair that reached her waist and deep brown eyes. She was extremely pretty, and made Ali feel even plainer than she already was.

She sat up and, noticing the golden circlet on the girl's forehead, immediately stood up.

"Your Majesty," she said, curtsying in the same clumsy manner as she did earlier.

"Please," the queen said, laughing, but not unkindly. "You may call me Susan. And who are you? I don't really think it would be polite to call you by some random name."

"Oh, my name's Alexis Scottson. You can just call me Ali though."

"Well then Ali, you have already met Ed, of course, and I apologize that Lucy and Peter aren't here to greet you, but they both are busy."

"Oh, that's alright. I was just hoping that I wasn't too much of a burden, staying here and all. But do you happen to know how I, uh, got here?"

Susan looked at Ali questioningly. "You don't know?"

Ali shook her head. "No. One minute I was in my bathroom with my parents yelling at each other downstairs, and the next thing I know, I'm being hauled out of a lake in who-knows-where."

"How odd…how very, very odd. Well, I suppose only Aslan can tell you how you got here, but Ed said he thought you were an Archenlander who had gotten lost. He thought you were drowning."

"Well, even if I was an Archen-person, I wouldn't have drowned. I know how to swim." She realized a second too late how snappish she had sounded, and immediately switched the subject. "Anyway, who is this Aslan person? Your brother mentioned him a bit, but he didn't say much."

Susan walked over to the wardrobe and threw open the doors. "First off, we'd better find you something to wear to dinner later. You aren't going in a nightgown." She sifted through the hanging dresses as she began talking.

"Aslan is the creator of Narnia, which is where you are now (specifically Cair Paravel). He created it about a thousand years ago, and only a few years ago, my siblings and I defeated the White Witch. She had put Narnia under a hundred year winter. He's really the King of Narnia, and he comes around very rarely. In fact, I've only seen him once since our Coronation. And—"

"Look," said Ali. "I'm very sorry to cut you off, but is he…human? I've seen talking horses and half-man, half-horse things and now I'm not sure _what_ to expect."

Susan raised her eyebrow. "Human? Never! He's a lion, of course."

Ali coughed. "What? A lion? Does—does he talk too?"

Susan pulled a few dresses out of the wardrobe. "Of course he does. What kind of ruler doesn't talk at all? It would be a funny way of ruling a land if you couldn't talk. Now, go try these on. Hurry now, dinner will be soon." The Queen pushed her towards the bathroom and shut the door behind her.

Ali sighed and looked at the dresses distastefully. "Dresses," she grumbled. "There's no escaping them. No matter where I go, there'll always be these cursed dresses…"

At once she bypassed two of the four, both of them being pink (the only color she despised) and looked doubtfully at the third one. She highly doubted yellow was "her color", and it was too elaborate anyway. She put on the last dress, a simple dark green one that fit her nicely and as she exited the bathroom, Susan looked at her, extremely pleased.

"Perfect. I thought that color would look best on you. Now come on, it should be time for supper already."

Susan took Ali's hand and led her down the mazes of hallways and stairs until they came to a pair of massive oak doors.

"Now," Susan said, "this is our Dining Hall, where we, obviously, eat meals every day. I can give you a full tour later."

Susan pushed the doors open and Ali nearly tripped as she walked into the magnificent Hall. The marble floor gleamed in the evening light that cascaded in through many stained-glass windows and the ceiling rose high above the two. Pillars of marble stood at frequent intervals around the room, and there was a large table in the center of the room. Ornate carvings adorned the ceiling and pillars and Ali was totally blown away by the room.

She stood there for a minute, staring up with her mouth gaping and widened eyes, taking it all in. Only did she come to her senses when someone cleared their throat near her. She looked around in confusion then uttered a shocked "Oh!" when she realized that along with Susan, Edmund and two other people were in the room. She blushed madly and muttered hurried apologies, but Susan cut her off.

"No need to apologize, Ali. Many people are the same way when they come. Obviously, you know Edmund. I'd like you to meet my sister, Queen Lucy—" A girl of aboutthirteen smiled warmly at Ali, "And my brother, the High King Peter." A young man of eighteen also smiled.

"Welcome to Cair Paravel," the High King said. "My brother has told me about what happened the other day. I do hope you will stay here for a while."

"Umm…" Ali looked at Susan. It's not like she would really have a choice, anyway. If she didn't know how she got to Narnia, how would she be able to find her way out? "Sure…" she said timidly, and it came out more like a question than a statement.

The four siblings sat down at their appointed seats and invited Ali to sit on Lucy's left side. She couldn't help feeling slightly uncomfortable as the family passed around trays and bowls of food. She had barged into some random country and was now staying in a royal castle with four Kings and Queens.

_What have I gotten myself into?_

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

That chapter may have seemed a bit pointless. Sorry! I'm working on trying to make it more interesting.Perhaps I'll have a ball for Lucy's fourteenth birthday or something.I'll probably be getting into the main plot in the next chapter or two.


	4. Chapter 4

Months passed and Ali became more comfortable in Cair Paravel. She was used to the talking animals now, as well as the Dryads and Naiads and all other sorts of creatures. Lucy had become the little sister she had never had and always wanted, Peter was like an older brother, she could talk to Susan about anything without getting embarrassed, and Edmund was like one of her best friends.

Lucy would soon turn fourteen, and a ball was being held in honor of her upcoming birthday. Visitors from neighboring countries often arrived to give Lucy their best wishes and greetings, so the castle was always busy. Ali hardly had any time to herself, always attending to guests and helping with ball-related matters.

One day, merely four days before the ball, she finally had a spare moment to relax. She exited the castle and made her way to the stables, planning to go for a ride on her gelding, Skaling. Skaling wasn't a Talking Horse, but he was very intelligent and understanding nevertheless.

Ali was in the middle of saddling the horse when Edmund walked into the stable.

"Going somewhere?"

"Oh, no," Ali replied, not looking up. "I'm merely saddling my horse just because I have nothing better to do. You know how fun putting a 20 pound lump of leather onto a 16 hand horse is that's extremely temperamental."

Edmund grinned. "Ah, of course. I'd forgotten the pure joy of the process. Mind if I join you?"

"'Course not. Will you be taking Phillip?"

"No, he's enjoying himself out in the pasture with some of the other Talking Horses. I'll take Felix today. He hasn't been out on a ride in a while."

Once the two horses were saddled up, Ali and Edmund cantered down to the beach and drove on through the waves. The cold water felt good under the hot summer sun, and the two horses seemed to be enjoying themselves too. They tossed their heads and whinnied, galloping faster down the shoreline. They never seemed to slow, even when Ali protested and pulled hard on Skaling's reins. He ignored her and kept on going. Ali was a bit worried, but Edmund was enjoying himself thoroughly, so she just let the horse go on.

They had gone on for a while, when suddenly Skaling stopped short. Ali was caught off guard, and was thrown over the horse's head. She shrieked as she was enveloped by the ocean's salt water which stung her eyes and accidentally swallowed a bit (well, really a lot). She gagged as her head came above the small waves only to see Edmund standing on the sand, laughing hysterically.

Ali gathered up the folds of her hunting dress and stood up. "Edmund!" she shrieked. "You…why, I should just—Oh, Ed, I _hate_ you, you little git!"

Edmund clutched his side, still laughing. "Aw, I love you too, Ali. What a sport."

Ali could feel herself turning red at his first comment, but he didn't seem to notice. She glared at him and grabbed both his wrists, throwing him into the gentle surf. He spluttered and spit out water.

"What was that for? Shouldn't you be throwing Skaling into the water? I didn't do anything!"

"Yeah, well, Skaling wasn't laughing at me, now was he?" She splashed water at him playfully and grinned.

Edmund stood up. "Oh, you're definitely going to get it now. Just wait," he called as she took off down the beach. "When you're not looking, I'll get back at you for that." He dashed after her.

"Ed," she called over her shoulder, "did I ever tell you that you run like a girl?"

"I do not! Anyway, you run like a jackrabbit with an arrow stuck in its butt."

"Say what?" Ali stopped and turned suddenly, cocking an eyebrow at the young king. "Now, if I didn't know better, I'd say that wasn't proper language for a King. Insulting a lady like that." She sniffed and raised her head in imitation of a snobbish, proper woman she had once known in her hometown.

"Excuse me? I don't believe _you_ should be telling a King he runs like a girl. Most people would frown upon behavior like that, you know."

"Pooh! I'm not 'most people'. I don't give a fig what they would or wouldn't do."

Edmund grinned. "You're a peach, Ali."

"Oho, so now you're referring to me as a fruit? Well, I'll let you know right now that I haven't got a stem sticking out of my head and I didn't pop off a tree! So you can just shut your mouth right now before I call you a blinking pear-face."

"Pear-face! Where'd you come up with that one?"

"The brain that is inside my head. Which, I would guess, you seem to lack." Ali smiled smugly and ran back to Skaling. "Come on, Ed! I'll race you back to Cair Paravel!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The two friends arrived back at the Castle just as the sun was setting. Its golden rays were reflected in its many glass windows as well as the glittering sea that spread out in front of it. Narnia's beauty never failed to amaze Ali, and, after she had unsaddled Skaling, she paused at the stable door to gaze out at the golden orb sinking below the glassy surface.

She felt so happy here in Narnia, yet she still felt like something wasn't right, something was missing. Underneath all her happiness and joy was a layer of foreboding despair which bubbled up mysteriously and caused her to become miserable. She hated it, and wished it would just go away, leave her alone and stop haunting her dark nights.

She jumped slightly as someone placed a hand on her shoulder. She turned and saw Edmund, who was staring out at the horizon too. A light smile danced across his face, and he seemed peaceful and content. Ali didn't want to ruin his happiness and tell him of her depression, or tell anyone for that matter. She just couldn't bring herself up to it. It was too painful, too hard.

Edmund looked down at his friend and smiled. He squeezed her damp shoulder and nodded towards the castle. "Come on; Peter and Su will be needing help planning Lu's ball."

The two were climbing the steps of the castle when there was a clattering of horse hooves and the grinding of wheels. Edmund turned and groaned. "Look who's arrived," he muttered.

Ali wheeled around, knowing all too much who he meant. And sure enough, out of the carriage jumped Princess Areese in her flowing and pouffy dress. Her golden hair flowed out from behind her and her blue eyes sparkled. She ran up to Edmund and flung her arms around his neck.

"Oh, _Edmund_!" she cried. "I've missed you _so_ much! It's so good to be back in Nanria! I'll be staying for a week, you know." She pulled away from him and batted her eyelashes, smiling winningly.

Edmund looked horrified. "A…a _week_?"

"Oh, of course! I hardly ever see you anymore, or dear Susan. Oh, where is she? I must say hello!" She started to the doors, then stopped. "Eddy, dear, you _do_ know you're all wet!"

Edmund smiled pleasantly, though Ali could tell he was about ready to strangle the Princess of Archenland. "Yes, I know, Areese. Thank you for pointing that out."

Areese giggled and flounced into the castle. Edmund rolled his eyes.

"Ali, please, _please_ don't let me get near her, or I might knock her upside the head. And that won't be good for our bonds with Archenland."

Ali grinned and linked arms with him. Using the nickname he despised and imitating Areese's high voice, she said, "Of _course_ not, Eddy, dear. You have absolutely _nothing _to fear. I'll keep you safe from that absolutely gorgeous and terrible princess."

Edmund snorted. "Nothing to fear. Right."

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End of chapter four. I'm not sure if there are carriages in Narnia or Archenland, but I didn't think Areese would approve of riding a horse to Narnia. So, she's got a carriage now. Hoorah. Anyway, I hope you liked it! Please review!


	5. Chapter 5

There was a knock on Ali's door and she groaned as she heard Susan call to her, sounding irritated.

"Ali! Get up! Lucy's party is today and we need to start getting ready!"

Ali rolled over as Susan pushed the door open. "Oh, go away Su. It can't be past 8 o'clock."

"It isn't, but we need to start getting ready _now_."

"Why now? It's too early to put on a dress and look pretty."

Susan threw the covers back and yanked Ali out of bed. "Maybe _you_ don't, but we need to set up and get Lucy ready. This is a huge party and she needs to look her best. Now, come on! Get ready!" With that, she left the room and Ali could hear her yelling out directions to other people.

Ali quickly changed into a comfortable dress before heading down to breakfast. Only Peter and Edmund were there, both looking extremely tired and irritated.

Ali took her seat. "Did Susan get you up, too?"

Edmund merely grunted and pushed some eggs in his plate around, not interested in eating. Peter sighed and nodded.

"I can tell already that this is going to be an extremely stressful day. Nobles arriving all day, having to set up the Ballroom, trying to tune out Susan talking about what everyone is going to wear, convincing Lucy that she has to wear a dress tonight…"

Ali grinned and Edmund snorted. "I don't know what's going to be harder: dealing with Areese all night or making Lucy wear her ball gown."

"Oh, really, Ed. Areese isn't _that_ bad," Peter said.

"Not that bad! She drives me absolutely insane! If I have to listen to her talk about clothes and parties and her courtiers one more time, I think I might burst."

Ali raised her eyebrows. "Ed, you do realize that she wants you to think that she gets courtiers every day, and that she won't be available forever?"

"Of course I do! But I don't care if she is available until I die; I don't like her and I don't want to become anything more than an acquaintance."

"But Ed," Peter protested, "it would form a good alliance with Archenland."

"We've already got an alliance with Archenland. What do you want another one for?"

"Sorry—it would form a _better_ pact with Archenland," Peter said dryly. "How's that?"

"You'll have to think of a better reason than that. You couldn't possibly place an alliance over your brother's happiness, could you?" Edmund looked at his brother innocently. Ali snorted into her goblet.

Peter merely sighed. "No, I couldn't. But just try to get along with her for the ball, won't you? I don't want a war to break out." He stood up and exited the hall.

Edmund smirked. "'Course not, dearest brother. Only a battle will start."

- - - - - - - - - -

The day passed smoothly, with nobles from different countries arriving every hour. Luckily, Ali didn't have to greet them, although she did have to sit up in Lucy's room while the two sisters argued for hours on end.

"Susan, you have _got_ to be kidding me! I'm _not_ wearing that!"

"Oh Lucy, what's wrong with it? You'll look beautiful in it! You'll turn many heads, I'm sure."

"I don't want to turn heads!"

"It's your birthday! You have to turn heads! Many young men will beg to dance with you."

"I can't dance!"

"Lucy, just try the dress on. You know how to dance and you _will_ dance if anyone asks you."

Furious, the younger girl snatched the dress and slammed the bathroom door. Susan sighed and sank down on the bed, holding her head.

"She's impossible to deal with! I can never make her do anything."

"Well," Ali said, "There's your first problem: you _make _her do things. Teenagers don't like to be told what to do. I certainly don't." She shrugged.

"Well…" Susan started, looking about to protest, when Lucy appeared, looking furious.

"Happy now? I'm in this cursed dress."

"Aw, Lu, you look so beautiful!" Ali cried mockingly, jumping up and admiring the flowing gown.

"Yes," Susan agreed, circling her younger sister. "I _do_ like it," ("At least one of us does," Lucy muttered) "It really does accent your hair, and once we fix it up, you'll be absolutely gorgeous. How do you want your hair? Perhaps half up, with it curled a little? Or a knot at the top? What about just letting it hang down? Oh, I don't know! What do you think Ali? Ali?"

The two sisters turned to the window seat where Ali was perched, gazing down at the castle front where Edmund and Peter were greeting the guests. Ali seemed to be daydreaming, although her gaze was fixed on the younger king.

Susan glanced knowingly at her sister who grinned in response. "You know, Ali," she started, "you'd better start getting ready for the ball. I was thinking you could wear one of my dresses. It's a lovely one, perfect for a ball like this. It's magenta, very pouffy and frilly with all kinds of lace and bows," (Ali started making faces of disgust here) "and I'm sure you'll look stunning in it. I'm sure princes from other countries will really love it, and you'll get many offers to dance. I think Edmund will like it too…"

Ali's head jerked up. "Rea—uh, what do you mean?"

Susan smirked. "Never mind. Now, what do you think we should do with Lucy's hair?"

Looking a bit flustered, Ali stood up. "Leaving it attached her head would probably be a good look, but that's just me." She shrugged. "I think I'm going to take a walk."

She quickly made her way out of the room into the hallway and rushed down the steps and outside. It was cool outside, but she felt oddly warm and shaky. She sat on a stone bench by a small pond and rested her head in her hands.

"Alexis, you fool," she muttered to herself. "What are you doing? Come to your senses and don't act like a blithering fool."

She sighed loudly in frustration. "Curse this whole mess. Bother it all."

She went back inside a bit later to get ready for the ball. Susan had gotten the magenta dress out, which wasn't as frilly and ugly as she had described it as. Ali was a bit relieved, but still quite down when the ball began.

- - - - - - - - - -

The ballroom was extremely crowded and stuffy when the ball began. The huge doors at the end opened, and the two Queens and two Kings walked in, Peter in the lead and Lucy at the rear. They took their respective thrones at the head of the room, Lucy looking positively thrilled. Susan seemed smug, finally having convinced Lucy to wear the gown she had tried on earlier.

Peter stood. "Good evening to all of you. My siblings and I greet you warmly tonight here at Cair Paravel in honor of Queen Lucy's fourteenth birthday. I hope you all have a wonderful evening and enjoy yourselves. And now, in honor of Lucy, the first dance."

The band in the corner of the room picked up a lively tune as the room clapped jovially. A young prince offered his hand to Lucy and she took it courteously and the two began the first dance. Slowly, others joined in and Ali retreated to the side of the room. She searched the whirling crowd for her friends, and saw Peter dancing with a princess from another country. Susan was dancing with Tumnus the Faun and Lucy was with the Prince. Edmund was with Areese, who seemed to be enjoying herself. Edmund, on the other hand, looked as if he would rather have the whole castle topple down on him. He caught Ali's eye and mouthed 'Help me!' but she merely grinned and waved joyfully at him.

The night passed slowly, and Ali had dance with a few fauns, a fox, Peter, a young Tarkaan from Calormen and some other young men she didn't know. She was starting to feel a bit lightheaded and tired as the night drew on. She was sitting down on the side of the room, trying to cool off, when Edmund walked over.

He smiled warmly at her and extended his hand just as the band struck up a slower song.

"Would you honor me with this dance, Lady Alexis?"

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Ooh. Funny place to end, I know, but whatever. Sorry it took so long to come out. I also apologize for its tackiness or corniness or whatever you want to call it. Anyway, please review!


	6. Chapter 6

Thank you to all of my reviewers! You're awesome! So, here's Chapter six! Voila! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Me? Owning Narnia? Hah! You're funny! Really, you should become a comedian!

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"Would you honor me with this dance, Lady Alexis?"

That's what Edmund said. _Lady_ Alexis. She wasn't a Lady! Well, literally, yes, she was, being a girl and all, but she wasn't royal and never did anything to deserve that title.

"Of course, Your Majesty." She took his hand and he led her onto the dance floor.

The two moved slowly to the music, Edmund occasionally twirling Ali around. It seemed awfully awkward; usually the two would joke around and make fun of the whole situation, but Edmund seemed oddly serious. She couldn't bring herself to meet his eyes, but she could feel his boring deeply into her.

_No, this isn't right,_ she thought to herself. _This isn't_ _normal. Why does this feel so strange? Oh, pull yourself together, Ali! Don't be a fool._

But she was still uncomfortable and didn't know why. There was just something strange about how he was acting towards her. Not that he had really said much to her all night, but just the way he _was_. Polite and quiet and almost _embarrassed_.

_Twilight Zone! Punk'd! Candid Camera! That's got to be it. Where's that camera? It has to be somewhere!_ Without realizing it, Ali started looking around the room, searching for that tiny red light that was always hidden so well. Behind the thrones? Set up behind a guard? Or maybe hidden in Peter's crown? Or—

"Ali?"

She blinked and snapped back to attention. Edmund was looking at her with an odd expression on his face. Worry?

"Huh?" Ali said blankly.

"Are you okay? You seem a bit paranoid; you were looking around like you were looking for something…"

"Oh! Umm, no, I'm fine. Just, err…tired…? And I feel a bit dizzy too," she added as an afterthought.

"Well then, you'd best sit down for a bit. I'll get you something to drink."

"Okay…" She waited until he disappeared into the crowd before making her way out of the Hall. She nodded to the two guards and weaved between the mingling guests, moving towards the large doors. So far, the coast was clear; she hadn't seen anyone she knew, and if should could just—

"Ali!" Susan rushed over to her friend's side. "Where are you going? The party's in there." She smiled jovially, obviously having a good time.

"Oh, I know, Su. I'm not _that_ thick. I'm just going to get a bit of fresh air."

"Alright, but don't stay out too long." She went in the direction of the Hall, and Ali sighed in relief.

She was soon out in the cool air and could taste the salt from the ocean. The moon glistened off the waves in the distance, which rippled silently and calmly. She remained unnoticed as she crept down the stairs and to the beach.

- - - - - - - - - -

Edmund looked around vainly, trying to figure out where Ali had gone. He had only left her for a minute to get her something to drink, and she had gone already.

"Girls," he muttered in annoyance. Then, "Ah, Su. Have you seen Ali?"

"Ali? You're looking for Ali?" Susan looked at him knowingly. "Why, yes, I have."

"Well…?" he said expectantly.

"Well what?" Susan looked at him innocently.

"Where _is_ she?"

"Oh, yes. She went…um…somewhere….What was I saying?"

"Susan!"

"Right! I think she went outside. Why are you so keen on knowing, anyway?" She asked him slyly.

Grumbling and turning a slight shade of red, Edmund stalked away from her. Susan smirked, then went off in search of Lucy. Their theories had been proven right.

- - - - - - - - - -

Ali sat cross-legged on the beach, not caring whether her dress got dirty or not. Her shoes were tossed idly beside her. She watched the water lap up against the shore.

She was softly singing a song she had heard when she was a child, but she couldn't remember where. It was an odd tune and she didn't understand what it meant, but she liked it nevertheless. (A/N—Don't mind this awful randomness that I made up. It -kind of- goes along to the tune "A Ballad of New Scotland".)

'_Try as I might I cannot see the stars up there,_

_wand'ring far through the ashes and dust in this place,_

_this lonely life I lead to here now,_

_this lonely life I lead here_

_is endearingly harsh._

_Cross-mixed with spices and herbs of hearth,_

_how can a lark sing with a thorn in its heart?_

_A wild wind blows through the world,_

_but is there time for a cat to hear itself sing?'_

She was so concentrated on her own thoughts that she didn't notice the sound of light footsteps behind her. Only when Edmund sat down beside her did she come to her thoughts.

"Oh, um, hi Ed," she said quietly, slightly embarrassed. "I didn't hear you."

He didn't say anything for a bit, but then he said, "You have a lovely voice."

Ali snorted. "Sure. If you say so."

"No, really, you do. It's much better than Susan's. She's really awful, but don't tell her I told you so."

Ali couldn't help cracking a smile. "Well, it _is_ true. Lucy has a good voice, though. So has Peter. I've never heard _you_ sing, though."

"You don't want to."

"Really? That isn't fair, now is it? You've heard me sing, so it's only fair that I hear _you_."

Once again, Edmund was silent. But then Ali could hear him humming softly, staring up at the moon. He seemed to be thinking about something from his past. Then,

"_The sun was setting in the west  
The birds were singing on every tree  
All nature seemed inclined for to rest  
But still there was no rest for me."_

Ali immediately recognized the tune and automatically started singing along.

"_Farewell to Nova Scotia, you sea-bound coast  
Let your mountains dark and dreary be  
For when I am far away on the briny ocean tossed  
Will you ever heave a sigh and a wish for me?"_

"You know it too?" Edmund asked, turning.

"Well, obviously. I started singing too, didn't I? And you have got a nice voice too."

For a third time, the two were silent and Ali found the silence unnerving.

"Ed?" she asked tentatively. "Is there—is there something you wanted to tell me?"

He shook his head slowly, almost sadly, then sighed and nodded. "Yes."

"Well…?"

"Ali, Peter and I—well, we're—we're going out to," he stopped and closed his eyes, as if saying it hurt, "to war," he finished, barely in a whisper.

"When?"

"Soon. A week at the latest."

Ali stood and went to the water's edge, letting the waves dance over her bare feet.

_War? They're going to war._

The word was almost too hard to process. That simple, short, three-letter word which never meant much to her, now held so much meaning. It meant death, hopelessness, dreams crashing down, her world falling down around her while she stood helpless.

Edmund came up behind her. "Ali, I'm sorry. I didn't want to tell you. Peter warned me not to. But I—I couldn't help it. You're my best friend. I couldn't keep that from you." His voice sounded like it was choking up.

"Who?" She was surprised her voice was so calm.

"The remainders of the White Witch's army."

"Why?"

"They're rebels. They're angry that we rule Narnia and not Jadis. They want us dead. I heard they're trying to bring her back from the dead."

Ali shivered. It just wasn't _fair_. Why should Ed and Peter have to go out to fight some stupid idiots who still honored a dead witch? She voiced these thoughts, and Edmund laughed hollowly.

"That's who they are, Ali. It'll be okay. We'll make it back. We've made it through other attacks in the past. We can make it again."

Tears stung Ali's eyes and threatened to fall and she angrily rubbed her eyes. Edmund noticed and sighed. "Oh, Al," he muttered, pulling her into a hug. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told you."

"Ed, it's just not fair!" she cried into his shoulder. "What if you or Peter gets hurt? Or even…_die_? It's just not right!"

"'Course it's not fair. We're Kings. We've got to do things that don't seem fair because we risk our life for our people. The Narnians."

They stood there for a while, comforting each other. Finally Edmund broke the embrace and said in a rather choked voice, "We'd better go back. It's getting late."

Ali merely nodded and wiped her eyes again, before the two returned to Cair Paraval. Everyone was so happy and it seemed like Ali and Edmund were living in a different world.

- - - - - - - - - - -

Whoa, fluffiness. And angst. Wasn't expecting that. It just kind of popped out. Anyway, my worst fear is that this is becoming too Mary-Sue-like. If it is, let me know. It seems like a cliché too, but that's just me. And it's also very random because I pretty much just typed whatever popped into my head. It isn't very exciting either, but I'll get to that in the next chapter…ish.

And yes, _Farewell to Nova Scotia_ is a real song. Ballad type, Canadian thing. It's one of my favorite songs, along with Return of the Unknown Soldier (which I'll incorporate in one of my later chapters…you'll see why!)


	7. Chapter 7

-hides face in shame- I am so sorry, my dear, loving, kind-hearted readers! Please forgive my thick-headed procrastinating self! dodges axes and arrows I haven't posted in almost two months, I know, but I can't help the fact that I procrastinate all the time. So maybe I am a bit lazy. But still, who isn't? So, many thanks and apologies to my loyal readers and/or reviewers and I hope you like this next chapter of Once Upon a Depression! Here goes!

Disclaimer: Honestly! Get a grip on reality! I don't own Narnia, because if I did, then I would call myself a genius, which I don't, and am not.

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Ali milled around Cair Paraval's dance hall in a daze, Edmund's words echoing through her mind. Susan asked her many times whether she was okay or not, but Ali just responded vaguely before wandering off again, which caused Susan to glare continuously at Edmund, figuring he must have done something. Lucy also sensed something was wrong, as she usually did, but had no idea what had happened.

Having no desire to be jostled around by happy guests, Ali retreated to her chambers and lay on her bed in complete darkness. It felt like she was going through the past all over again. Her brother had gone off to help fight in the war, and not even six months later was her family contacted by the military and told that he had been killed in battle. As if she didn't have enough troubles then, already! It only made things worse; her parents fought more often, her mother's stress affected her health, and her father seemed incapable of dealing with his son's death. And of course, Ali's depression became almost unbearable.

The depression. And it wasn't that period in America where the stock market went bankrupt and many people found it hard to live. No, this was her own depression. The cruel, twisting of her mind, causing her to become sad without reason, paranoid, stressed and nearly suicidal. Sure, it had been cured for a while. She went to a therapist and psychiatrist and even took medicine. It usually took care of her problems, but there were times when even the medicine couldn't solve her problems and take all her worries away. And how scary it could be then. How many times had she wanted to kill herself or just get away from the awful world she knew? It seemed impossible to escape…until she entered Narnia.

And what a relief it had been! She thought she had escaped all of her troubles, but now , now, it was like going back in time, going back to Earth. It just wasn't _fair_. She had been so happy! But now!

Ali tossed on her bed, tears leaking from her eyes. She had to think of something to stop Peter and Edmund from going to war, but _what_? Nothing would stop them from protecting their country and people. That's just the kind of leaders they were. That's why they were_ kings_—because they cared for their people.

- - - - - - - - - - -

Edmund felt terrible. Why had he even told Ali about the war? Well, it had to come out sometime. Ali would have been absolutely furious if she hadn't known until the last minute, and she would most likely never have forgiven him. But would Peter forgive him either? He had warned his younger brother not to tell anyone about the plans so as not to worry them. He would be furious when he found out. But, as it would turn out, Peter was not the one sibling whose wrath he should fear the most.

Edmund slowly made his way from the main hall and up the staircase, planning to go apologize to Ali. _Wait—apologize? For what? What do I have to apologize to her for? For making her worry about Peter and me? For stressing her out, or unnerving her? Or for not telling her sooner? Oh, shut up, Edmund. You have _got_ to stop talking to yourself in your head all the time! It can't be normal._

He was staring at his feet as he rounded a corner and nearly ran into someone who was standing in the middle of the corridor.

"Oh, excuse me, I—Susan? What in the name of Aslan are you—?"

Susan glared at him so hard that it could have melted the White Witch, had she still been alive. "Edmund! _What did you do_?"

"What?" He stared blankly at his sister, although he did shrink back from her hard gaze a little.

Susan took a few steps forward. "What did you do to Ali? She was perfectly fine when she went outside and then you went and followed her and she came back in not ten minutes later looking as if she had attended her best friend's funeral!" She took a deep breath.

"She just might be, in time," Edmund muttered, looking down at his shoes and scuffing them on the stone floor.

"Ed, do you always have to talk so quietly? You must stop mumbling! Now, _what did you say to Ali_?"

Edmund said nothing and Susan was growing impatient quickly. "Edmund Leland Pevensie! Answer me now!" Once again, he didn't answer. Susan forced his face upward and his eyes met hers. At once, she saw the truth.

"Ed! Why would you do that? Why would you tell her about the war?"

"I didn't mean to! I wasn't planning on it—honest! But she just knew that something was bothering me, and—oh Susan! You know how bad I am at keeping things a secret! Especially when they're that big!" He looked at his sister earnestly and pleadingly. "Besides, she would have to find out sometime!"

Susan sighed and rubbed her temples in aggravation. "Edmund, just—I'll—go somewhere."

"How long were you going to keep it from her, anyway? What was the point of not telling her right away? I thought you said she was like a part of our family, but you wouldn't even tell her about the battle?"

"I didn't want her to worry about it!"

"It's not like she wasn't going to worry anyway!"

"Edmund!" Susan was absolutely fuming now. "You don't under_stand_! Now that she knows we're going away to war and she can't go, she's going to devise some plan to change things around. You know how she hates to miss out on the action! And she'll somehow follow us into battle."

"What? Us? What do you mean by 'us'?"

Susan rolled her eyes. "You're the thickest king I've ever known, Ed. I mean you, me and Peter."

"_You_! You're a girl!"

"Oh, well spotted, Ed," she said dryly.

Edmund waved his hands around in exasperation. "No, no. You know what I mean—you're a girl, and you can't go into battle."

"Oh, really! Well, I'd like to see you try and stop me from going!"

"I don't think I'll have to! Peter surely won't let you even get _near_ the bat—"

"Susan? Edmund?"

The two turned and saw Lucy standing behind them, looking extremely upset. They immediately felt guilty for fighting with each other in front of their younger sister.

Susan stepped forward a bit. "Lucy, what are you doing up here? Shouldn't you be downstairs?"

"Well, yes, but I came looking for you two and Ali." She fumbled with the sleeves of her dress. "And I think Ed's right, Su. Ali does have a right to know." She looked at the older queen innocently. "And you _shouldn't _go into the battle. It's hard enough with Peter and Ed going, never mind you."

Susan looked about to protest, but Lucy cut her off. "Besides, if you get to go, then I'm coming too. I've got my cordial to at least help out a little, even if I can't fight. But you do know I can."

Susan chewed her lip nervously and angrily. Finally she merely sighed in frustration and stomped her foot. "Peter will decide then. He's High King." And that was that.

Once she had disappeared, Ed sighed. "Gee, Lu, I'm sorry. I hope we didn't ruin your party."

Lucy smiled at her brother and took his hand, leading him back downstairs. "Of course not. Susan and I have already had that discussion—about us going into the battle, I mean. Peter has already banned the two of us from going, but that doesn't mean Susan will stop trying. And I have no doubt Ali will try to come along too."

Edmund sighed again. "That's what I'm afraid of."

- - - - - - - - - - -

Ali tossed in her bed, feeling extremely restless. She had been laying there for nearly an hour and still couldn't fall asleep. Well, she really had no reason to fall asleep, since it was only ten at night, but she didn't exactly feel up to going back down to Lucy's party.

She finally forced herself to lie still for a few minutes, and eventually felt herself drifting off to sleep. She didn't fight it, and soon fell into a calm and peaceful sleep.

But the serenity didn't last long. Soon, awful, horrid dreams pierced her restless sleep. Once again, she began tossing and turning as images of a bloody battlefield and warriors in blood-soaked clothing and armor hovered in sight. Swords flashed in the air, stained crimson, and arrows whistled by, coming from all directions. And Ali seemed to be in the middle of it all, yet she was never injured. In fact, no one even took any notice of her. She saw many familiar faces around her as well as many not-so-familiar faces, and most of them were quite ugly, while the rest were the most appalling things you would hope to never dream of looking upon. She realized with a start that this was the White Witch's remaining followers and they were fighting Narnians. This was the battle that would take place in a few days' time, and it horrified her to be seeing into the future. Or so she thought, anyway. She had never been in a battle, but this is how she imagined it to look like. Utter chaos, with screams and groans filling the air as well as the deafening sound of sword against sword as enemies fought to the death in locked combat. Dead bodies of all kinds of creatures littered the ground and blood flowed openly from everywhere.

Death was not glamorous, and neither was battle.

Suddenly a rider swept by on a huge horse, swinging a sword left and right. Oftentimes the blows were parried by offenders on the ground, but when the steel found its destination, there was no hope for the victim. Ali was nearly knocked down by the rider and his mount, but as it flew by her, it stopped suddenly and turned. Whoever it was seemed to notice Ali and stared at her through the visor of his helmet. Slowly, he reached up and pulled of his helmet.

Ali had just barely glimpsed the face (and was shocked beyond all reason) when there was a flash of light and she was jolted awake. She gasped and sat straight up before blinking in surprise and shielding her eyes. A lone figure stood at the end of her bed, and Ali didn't have to think twice to realize who it was.

Aslan.

She had only heard about him, and couldn't believe that he was here, with her, now. He was like everything she had heard, and even so much more.

She slipped off her bed unconsciously and fell to her knees in front of him. Aslan bent forward and gently pressed his nose to her forehead.

"Rise, small one." His deep yet soothing voice comforted her deeply and she stood up slowly.

Aslan's dark golden eyes bore into her brown ones. "You know what you must do."

Ali nodded silently.

"Good. But remember, battles and wars are no small matters—they are serious and deadly, so you must be absolutely sure you can commit to what you are about to do."

Ali hesitated, then, "I—I think I can be brave enough, Aslan. Are you sure it's what I must do?"

"Only if you think it's what has to be done."

Ali looked at the floor, then looked back at Aslan. She nodded curtly. "I have to do it. There's no other way, and I know it's right."

Aslan smiled in his lion-like way. "Then take peace and comfort with you, dear one, as well as bravery and strength. Know that I will be next to you every step of the way."

Aslan breathed on her, and with that, he was gone.

Ali blinked and stood motionless. Had that really just happened? Or had she been dreaming? But no, she couldn't have been. She felt confident and strong, and that had come with the breath he breathed on her.

Slowly, a smile spread across her face. She knew what she had to do, and there was nothing in all of Narnia (or any other country for that matter) that would stop her.

She lit the lamp by her bed and immediately started working. She would stay up all night and would work into the next few days if she had to. Time was limited, and she had to be ready.

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Read! Review! Rejoice! Be happy that I actually posted chapter 7!

What is Ali's remarkable and ingenious plan? That's coming up next time in…chapter 8! -gasp-


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